01/08/2018
Lately I have been pressuring myself into creating artwork as fast as possible and totally forgot to enjoy the process. Once that happens I think about my past self. That 4 or 5 year old girl that took a pencil in her hand for the first time. I think about the moment when I first decided to draw something simply for the pure joy of it. There was no pressure to create as many artworks as possible. No pressure to immediately improve myself. I was simply drawing for the sake of drawing. There was...
12/07/2017
There was a time when I used to regularly see dead birds in my neighborhood. It was devastating to see them crushed and covered with blood on the streets. There was something so utterly wrong with seeing those creatures in this posture. Birds are supposed to fly. They are supposed to be up there, in the sky, not down here with the rest of us. It was heartbreaking and I was wondering why I had to see something like that. And then I realized that the pain I was feeling when seeing those birds was...
11/29/2017
I realized that me constantly living in the past or the future is the root of all evil (almost). The nightmares, the sleep problems, tiredness and of course anxiety. I realized if I don't pay attention to the present moment, the voice in my head keeps talking and talking and it's not always about negative things. Sometimes I am thinking about positive things but even that gets exhausting. It's like, I'm either too anxious, or I am too excited. Both is annoying because I never get to slow down....
11/14/2017
I learned something today. It is very important to let other people make their own mistakes or their own experiences in life, even though I just want to be helpful, even though I just want to prevent that other person from feeling regret. I am human myself, I make mistakes so what makes me think that it is my duty to keep others from experience their own life lessons? And I am not all-knowing. What if my opinion keeps that other being from actually experiencing a stroke of luck? I don't want to...
11/09/2017
I have just recently created my last two artworks of my series “Brave is the heart”. One is called “Brokenhearted” and the other one is called “Victorious” I personally I feel like these two projects are perfect for finishing the Brave is the heart - art collection. And of course I am already working on my next art series. I already know what it is called: “Wonderful world”. I don't want to say too much but I'm definitely getting out of my comfort zone with this one. I'm going...
10/30/2017
I was working on a painting a couple of days ago. It is the last piece of art for my collection “Brave is the heart”. The painting is called “Victorious” and it means a great deal to me because it represents the victory over the many physical, emotional and spiritual issues/problems that I have been dealing with for the last couple of years. So I put a lot of work in it. Everything went well but then I started to make mistakes. I wasn't able to color my artwork the way I wanted to. In...
10/21/2017
Lately I have been thinking about different moments in my childhood. I suddenly started to remember the different foods I liked to eat, the sweets I loved to snack on or the movies and cartoons I loved to watch with my siblings. These memories make me so happy. So I've spent the last week with cooking the meals I loved to eat as a child. I was and I still am watching several shows and cartoons which remind me of the good old times, while eating chocolate and all kind of sweets. It's like the...
10/13/2017
Ever since I started meditating again, my dreams have been super clear and I have had several lucid dreams again. Have you ever had a dream about something beautiful and exciting yet strange at the same time, simply because you are not used to that kind of atmosphere? Has it ever happened to you, that you get so excited, that you unwillingly woke yourself up from a lucid dream? I've had this kind of problem very often. For example: I often dream of dragons. It is beautiful but also kind of...
10/09/2017
Lately I have been observing myself. I noticed that very often I am way too hard on myself. It seems like my mind has been trained to be very judgmental. A lot of times I have an exact idea of how things need to be. And if I can't seem to meet those self created expectations, I am disappointed with myself. Why are we humans so quick to judging ourselves and others? The need to be perfect and to do everything the right way is so exhausting. We need a break. I know I do. So I decided to be nicer...
10/05/2017
I have had passion for art since I was a little girl, though I repeatedly lost sight of it, but I made a decision. The decision to keep on creating despite the many stresses of life. I made the tough decision to keep choosing art, no matter what excuses my mind would tell me in order to keep me away from it. I am learning to accept myself, which is not easy at all. A huge part of my surrounding did a very good job with making me feel like shit, simply for being me. Now is the time to take full...